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What if becoming someone was never the goal? A therapist and Enneagram facilitator on shedding the personas we mistake for our true selves.
Today you’re in for a treat! I’m bringing my pal Koula Callahan, master yoga instructor and speaker for the Self-Care Workshop, on the blog to share why movement, namely yoga, is incredibly powerful and important for us to practice as we move through our days. If you’ve always wondered what all the fuss is about —and yoga and why is really effective, today is the day—you’re going to get some answers.
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In April, I bombed a keynote—45 minutes late, broken A/V, a room that wanted their drink tickets.
Here's what that failure taught me about participation, discernment, and why every Enneagram type has its own sophisticated reason to wait until it's "ready."
What if becoming someone was never the goal? A therapist and Enneagram facilitator on shedding the personas we mistake for our true selves.
Today you’re in for a treat! I’m bringing my pal Koula Callahan, master yoga instructor and speaker for the Self-Care Workshop, on the blog to share why movement, namely yoga, is incredibly powerful and important for us to practice as we move through our days. If you’ve always wondered what all the fuss is about —and yoga and why is really effective, today is the day—you’re going to get some answers.
Six months before my breast cancer diagnosis, I was quietly falling apart. This is my story and the heart behind why I created the Self Care Workshop.
Discover how each Enneagram type relates to structure—and why the right kind of rhythm can help you thrive. Learn how to create supportive routines without stifling growth.
When we hear the phrase self-care, most of us picture bubble baths, yoga classes, or carving out an hour to finally read that book on our nightstand. And while those things absolutely have their place, if we stop there, we miss the deeper, sustaining work that actually helps us thrive.
What I’ve learned in my own healing and in my work with clients is this: self-care without self-compassion can feel more like another to-do list item when it’s really a relationship to nurture.
There’s a moment, sometimes subtle and sometimes seismic, when you realize you have the chance to begin again. Maybe it’s the first crisp morning after a long summer. Maybe it’s a job change, a new relationship, or even the quiet decision to show up differently in the one you’re already in.
I’ve learned that beginnings—whether chosen or thrust upon us—are vulnerable places. They ask something of us: a willingness to step into what we don’t yet know. And if you’re anything like me, that’s both exciting and a little unnerving.
This is where curiosity comes in.
Are you ready to stop running on empty and start living from a place of wholeness?
Join me, alongside Ally Fallon (best selling author + writing coach) and Koula Callahan (yoga teacher + speaker), for an unforgettable day of enneagram insight, intentional writing, and embodied movement — what I call the trifecta of true self-care.
Somewhere between the smell of freshly sharpened pencils and the first rustle of fall leaves, we’re invited into a familiar rhythm—one that feels both nostalgic and energizing. Whether or not you have a backpack in your life anymore, the back-to-school season has a way of nudging us to recalibrate, recommit, and reset. It’s not just for students. It’s for all of us seeking a deeper sense of alignment and intention.
So, in the spirit of fresh starts and The Back-to-School Edit.
“You can’t stay in your corner of the Forest waiting for others to come to you. You have to go to them sometimes.”
“Almost everything will work again if you unplug it for a few minutes…including you.”
— Anne Lamott
“The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.”
Mitch Albom
“The Enneagram helps you discover who you were before the world told you who you were supposed to be.”
-Ian Cron
“Distractions are everywhere. Notice what takes your attention, acknowledge it, and then let it go.”
-Andy Puddicombe, Founder of Headspace
Perfectionism is the voice of the oppressor, the enemy of the people. It will keep you cramped and insane your whole life.
-Anne Lamott
“As long as you keep secrets and suppress information, you are fundamentally at war with yourself…The critical issue is allowing yourself to know what you know. That takes an enormous amount of courage.”
Bessel van der Kolk
“Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.”
-Rumi
“Where we think we need more self-discipline, we usually need more self-love.”
- Tara Mohr
“The human body is a river of intelligence, energy, and information that is constantly renewing itself in every second of our existence.”
- Deepak Chopra
“When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which had never happened.”
– Winston Churchill
“If we observe ourselves truthfully and non-judgmentally, seeing the mechanisms of our personality in action, we can wake up, and our lives can be a miraculous unfolding of beauty and joy.”
-Richard Rohr
“People will forget what you said, forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
-Maya Angelou
How to Write your Own Success Story
Seventy percent of success is showing up.
— Woody Allen
How do you define success? Most people do with two usual suspects on the scene: wealth and power.
If that’s your definition, guess what? Great! That is… if that's how you’ve chosen to write your success story…
I’m struck by how few people call into question their personal version of success. We do it all the time with our health, our relationships, and our political preferences. For example, if something in your diet is causing a strange reaction or doesn’t taste good, chances are you steer clear of that something in the future. Or if a relationship feels toxic or disrespectful, you’d likely address the issue at hand, or, even part ways after awhile if it gets bad enough.
Hopefully, at some point along the way we call into question what no longer aligns with our values and ceases to work for us. This is what showing up and advocating for ourselves looks like.
After all, as humans, we have the distinct freedom and responsibility to write and revise our stories over time. It’s what sets us apart from animals.
So why do we hold so tightly to that narrow definition of success? Besides, some of the most successful people I’ve ever known don’t measure theirs by a bank balance or a Kardashian-esque social media following. Instead, they make waves in far more lasting, impactful ways.
I believe the litmus test for success is based on character rather than clout. I also believe we get to define our own version of success based on the person we’re becoming. When was the last time you took inventory of your definition? If it’s been awhile, perhaps it’s time to revisit. After all, with age comes wisdom (we hope) and often shifting values. If in your 20’s and 30’s success looked like that big job on Wall Street or a record deal with a major label, perhaps it shifted to meaningful relationships or creative expression in your 40’s and 50’s. Who knows? Well, you do…
Here are a few pillars to build your new success story around. Push them around. Color them in a bit.
Health: Our health is the foundation of all other functions in life. Life is a much better place when we feel good. I’m not only talking about physical health, but emotional as well as spiritual.
Contentment: The ability to cultivate contentment despite our circumstances is true badassery in my book. The secret sauce in this recipe—gratitude.
Self-Awareness: How you show up in the world affects everything and impacts overall success, especially work and relationships. Cultivating greater self-awareness through therapy and self-development tools like the Enneagram creates a positive ripple effect.
Generosity: Giving back through time and resources is intrinsically a selfish act if you think about it. The practice of generosity gives an instant hit of purpose and joy if done from a place of honesty.
Presence: There is no better way of fully showing up in the world than consciously awake in the present moment. It’s the the most valuable real estate we’ll ever own. When we practice mindful presence, we stave off anxiety (“out there” thinking) and forego nostalgia (idealizing the past).
Bonus: Share your new success story and this exercise with a friend. Relationships are where these beliefs are really hardwired-in!
Love & Gratitude,
Katie
In April, I bombed a keynote—45 minutes late, broken A/V, a room that wanted their drink tickets.
Here's what that failure taught me about participation, discernment, and why every Enneagram type has its own sophisticated reason to wait until it's "ready."