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What if becoming someone was never the goal? A therapist and Enneagram facilitator on shedding the personas we mistake for our true selves.
Today you’re in for a treat! I’m bringing my pal Koula Callahan, master yoga instructor and speaker for the Self-Care Workshop, on the blog to share why movement, namely yoga, is incredibly powerful and important for us to practice as we move through our days. If you’ve always wondered what all the fuss is about —and yoga and why is really effective, today is the day—you’re going to get some answers.
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In April, I bombed a keynote—45 minutes late, broken A/V, a room that wanted their drink tickets.
Here's what that failure taught me about participation, discernment, and why every Enneagram type has its own sophisticated reason to wait until it's "ready."
What if becoming someone was never the goal? A therapist and Enneagram facilitator on shedding the personas we mistake for our true selves.
Today you’re in for a treat! I’m bringing my pal Koula Callahan, master yoga instructor and speaker for the Self-Care Workshop, on the blog to share why movement, namely yoga, is incredibly powerful and important for us to practice as we move through our days. If you’ve always wondered what all the fuss is about —and yoga and why is really effective, today is the day—you’re going to get some answers.
Six months before my breast cancer diagnosis, I was quietly falling apart. This is my story and the heart behind why I created the Self Care Workshop.
Discover how each Enneagram type relates to structure—and why the right kind of rhythm can help you thrive. Learn how to create supportive routines without stifling growth.
When we hear the phrase self-care, most of us picture bubble baths, yoga classes, or carving out an hour to finally read that book on our nightstand. And while those things absolutely have their place, if we stop there, we miss the deeper, sustaining work that actually helps us thrive.
What I’ve learned in my own healing and in my work with clients is this: self-care without self-compassion can feel more like another to-do list item when it’s really a relationship to nurture.
There’s a moment, sometimes subtle and sometimes seismic, when you realize you have the chance to begin again. Maybe it’s the first crisp morning after a long summer. Maybe it’s a job change, a new relationship, or even the quiet decision to show up differently in the one you’re already in.
I’ve learned that beginnings—whether chosen or thrust upon us—are vulnerable places. They ask something of us: a willingness to step into what we don’t yet know. And if you’re anything like me, that’s both exciting and a little unnerving.
This is where curiosity comes in.
Are you ready to stop running on empty and start living from a place of wholeness?
Join me, alongside Ally Fallon (best selling author + writing coach) and Koula Callahan (yoga teacher + speaker), for an unforgettable day of enneagram insight, intentional writing, and embodied movement — what I call the trifecta of true self-care.
Somewhere between the smell of freshly sharpened pencils and the first rustle of fall leaves, we’re invited into a familiar rhythm—one that feels both nostalgic and energizing. Whether or not you have a backpack in your life anymore, the back-to-school season has a way of nudging us to recalibrate, recommit, and reset. It’s not just for students. It’s for all of us seeking a deeper sense of alignment and intention.
So, in the spirit of fresh starts and The Back-to-School Edit.
“You can’t stay in your corner of the Forest waiting for others to come to you. You have to go to them sometimes.”
“Almost everything will work again if you unplug it for a few minutes…including you.”
— Anne Lamott
“The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.”
Mitch Albom
“The Enneagram helps you discover who you were before the world told you who you were supposed to be.”
-Ian Cron
“Distractions are everywhere. Notice what takes your attention, acknowledge it, and then let it go.”
-Andy Puddicombe, Founder of Headspace
Perfectionism is the voice of the oppressor, the enemy of the people. It will keep you cramped and insane your whole life.
-Anne Lamott
“As long as you keep secrets and suppress information, you are fundamentally at war with yourself…The critical issue is allowing yourself to know what you know. That takes an enormous amount of courage.”
Bessel van der Kolk
“Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.”
-Rumi
“Where we think we need more self-discipline, we usually need more self-love.”
- Tara Mohr
“The human body is a river of intelligence, energy, and information that is constantly renewing itself in every second of our existence.”
- Deepak Chopra
“When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which had never happened.”
– Winston Churchill
“If we observe ourselves truthfully and non-judgmentally, seeing the mechanisms of our personality in action, we can wake up, and our lives can be a miraculous unfolding of beauty and joy.”
-Richard Rohr
“People will forget what you said, forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
-Maya Angelou
Why Empathy is Everything Right Now
“Opinion is really the lowest form of human knowledge. It requires no accountability, no understanding. The highest form of knowledge is empathy, for it requires us to suspend our egos and live in another's world. It requires profound purpose larger than the self kind of understanding..”
-Bill Bullard
Perhaps like you, I’ve been spending more time on social media lately. I have had nothing original to contribute and that’s the glorious point. Last Tuesday’s #BlackoutTuesday marked the first day of one week (and inevitably beyond) to consciously focus on joining our voices, efforts, and resources to become better educated about what’s going on in our country and how we can advocate for healing a very old wound: racism.
Throughout the week, as I talked to friends, family, and clients, I was amazed by how many times I heard a similar thread: “I am listening." Listening for truth, knowing, conviction, and ultimately for hope.
What a powerful place of unity to stand amidst a shattered landscape. Listening.
As I poured over trusted friends and influencers feeds and stories, I came across this quote by a man I’d never heard of, Bill Bullard. It shook me to the core. It reads:
“Opinion is really the lowest form of human knowledge. It requires no accountability, no understanding. The highest form of knowledge is empathy, for it requires us to suspend our egos and live in another’s world. It requires profound purpose larger than the self kind of
understanding.”
Everything in my body leaped. YES! This is it!
I googled Mr. Bullard and found very little. The most I could muster was his past profession as the Dean of a San Fransisco High School. Fitting. Clearly, he didn’t need much of a footprint to make an impact.
I bet he was a really good listener, I thought to myself as I was searching to find out more about him.
And whereas I deeply value my opinions and those of others, I’m struck by this idea that we are being called to work through the ego’s slippery need to be heard and be right. No matter what you believe or subscribe to, the undeniable truth is that we must rise up and stand as our highest selves were created to in the face of glaring pain: in love, in listening, in empathy.
Opinions come easy.
Empathy requires understanding and humility.
Opinions divide.
Empathy builds bridges.
Opinions are judgments.
Empathy leans heavy on curiosity.
Opinions want to win.
Empathy wants to give.
When I read that quote, I realized just how important the work of understanding is for our own healing and the healing of a hurting world. I also realized this is why I love the Enneagram so much—it leads us through the tight spaces of ego entrapment and into the wide-open fields of compassion, shedding the hard outer shell of fear one layer at a time.
It helps us understand that our way of seeing the world isn’t the right way, it’s just one way.
Let’s commit to the work of listening to understand. Not listening to formulate a clever response based on opinion. Listening to understand so that we may love.
Love & Gratitude,
Katie
HUGE P.S. Join me THIS FRIDAY at 10 am CST as I chat with Ian Cron, author of The Road Back to You and host of Typology podcast about using the Enneagram as a tool for developing Empathy.
Your Brain on the Enneagram: A Chat with Dr. Jerome Lubbe (Copy)
“If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor.”
-Desmond Tutu
Today I stand in solidarity with our music community.
To listen.
To reflect.
To pray.
Lord, have mercy on us.
To educate myself on the ways I can do my part.
To seek justice in the face of systemic racism that has poisoned our nation for long enough now.
I ask you to do the same.
Katie
In April, I bombed a keynote—45 minutes late, broken A/V, a room that wanted their drink tickets.
Here's what that failure taught me about participation, discernment, and why every Enneagram type has its own sophisticated reason to wait until it's "ready."