A permission slip to change your mind

Do you ever get stymied into thinking it has to be a certain way?  

Pigeon-hole yourself into one rigid way or outcome?  I know I do.  It’s like we become so attached to our role—our identity, in the story we’re living, we’re held prisoner by its familiar plot line.  Interestingly, we often don’t even know we’re behind bars, just like Willie says.    

In my early 30’s, I was pivoting from a career in music to a career as a psychotherapist and coach.  The hardest part wasn’t grad school (I’d gladly be a professional student if you’ll pay ;)  It wasn’t building a private practice.  It wasn’t the actual work.  Though wobbly at first, that part came pretty naturally. I’d been in enough personal therapy to know the ropes. 

The hardest part was loosening my death grip on an identity as a singer/songwriter.  My ego was far too cozy on a stage or in a writing room.  That story had served me in many ways, but wasn’t ultimately what I felt called to do. I remember having coffee with my pal and colleague, Reb Buxton many years ago when I was terrified—deep in the pivot.  He asked me, “What if you could just let go of music?” I stared back like he had eight heads.  The Spirit was willing, but the flesh was weak.  

I recently heard someone very smart talk about discipline in a curious way.  The root word of discipline is “disciple.” I think most of us agree that discipline is a good thing, yes? But what if the thing we are governed by stops serving us?  He then posed the question, “Do you ever ask yourself what you are a disciple of?” Are we consciously choosing to follow that which serves us and is in integrity with our value system and desires?  Or are we blindly chained to an old ego story—a prison? 

Oof.  I know…a real head-scratcher. 

Mo Willems has a profound saying.  “If you ever find yourself in the wrong story, LEAVE.” 

Sometimes, it’s as if we need a permission slip to change our minds and leave an expired story.  Maybe that’s a job, a relationship, a church, a limiting belief system, a lifestyle, a hairstyle, (no really… losing all my hair during chemo was beyond freeing!)  Whatever it is for you, you have a get out of jail free card to leave.  

I suppose the real question is, “What story do you WANT to be in?”  

Join me in my Enneagram Mastermind group starting August 21st and let’s find out…