3 Tips for Navigating Workplace Conflict

Conflict in the workplace is inevitable.  This does not, however, make it easy (for many, that is.) As an enneagram four, I remember so many times in my 20’s when I’d take constructive feedback at certain jobs deeply personal.  It became yet another reason on my never ending list why I didn’t quite measure up.  Conflict felt scary. I might be rejected…or worse… misunderstood!?

I must have completely missed the class Conflict Resolution 101 in college.  

So, how do you manage conflict successfully?  In one word? Self-awareness. Self-awareness is an integral piece to navigating conflict. Knowing the thoughts, behaviors and motivations behind what you think, act and feel allows you to understand how your attitude and behaviors affect others and how they affect you. Recognizing your own hot buttons and those of others, gives you the opportunity to take a step back and respond intentionally rather than react emotionally.

Developing self-awareness doesn’t come easy though. It requires us to take an honest look inward. The Enneagram provides us with the tools to foster that self-observation and introspection, that in turn, makes room for empathy and compassion for others…including our colleagues.

When you understand your Enneagram type and the personality styles of those you work with, it breeds a culture of understanding, respect, and connection so that when conflicts do arise, they can be resolved more quickly.

Here are 3 tips to help you navigate conflict in the workplace: 

1.    Consider the perspective of others.  The Enneagram teaches that each of us views the world through a different lens. This applies to how we approach conflict as well. How do you typically react to conflict?  Do you avoid it? Engage in it? Assume you are correct and everyone else is wrong?  For example, let’s consider The Challenger.  Eights can have powerful/bold reactions when there is a conflict and aren’t shy about letting you know where they stand. They seek a strong reaction from you as well. Without one, they may assume you aren’t taking the situation seriously. They also have a strong desire to resolve the problem quickly and once the issue is resolved they move on. 

On the other hand, conflict is extremely uncomfortable for some types, such the Enneagram 9. Their approach is to avoid or deny conflict altogether. An Eight’s in-your-face approach can feel intimidating and aggressive to a Peacemaker.  Instead of assuming your coworkers approach conflict the same as you, challenge your perspective and consider how your coworker(s) might see things differently.

2.    Practice empathy.  Take a moment to acknowledge your own feelings about the situation so you can approach it with a clear head. But also consider the emotions of your team members before responding or engaging.  Empathizing with how they view or feel about the situation creates a margin of time and understanding that is necessary in order to build safety in times of conflict.  There is nothing worse than having to engage in workplace conflict in a culture of fear and toxicity.

3.    Establish open and transparent communication. Be upfront and honest about your thoughts yet ask questions and practice active listening to build trust and respect among your colleagues.  This act of openness encourages collaboration and can more easily lead to a mutually agreeable resolution.

The enneagram is an elegant framework for the often clunky conflict that inevitably comes up at work.  If you’re experiencing unchecked conflict in your workplace, I’d love to guide your team toward a positive resolution.  Click here for more information.